Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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