Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Randomize
