take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
