you win again, gameday.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
