remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
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