Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Randomize
