Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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