Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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