She said her name was "party"
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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