I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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