it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize