meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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