I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
