how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
We got so high we made milksteak
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize