Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
she pinky promised me she was 18
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
