Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
