i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Randomize
