I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
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