You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
