I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
there is puke in my bra ... again
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