I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
