have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
