Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
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Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
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Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever