My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
21 Awkward Ways People Found Out Their Partner Was Into Outrageous Sex Acts
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.