I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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