he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
I'm really busy with my period
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