Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize