is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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