So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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