I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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