So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
