google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
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