You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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