Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
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