awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
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