so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize