Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
