How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
My penis needs a shock collar
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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