i permit you to call me
it hurts more in the daytime
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
