i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Please, let me fuck your mom
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
My breasts were aching with rage.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
