I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I want her autograph on my taint
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
