haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Randomize