i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
