This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
