Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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