About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
