You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
