I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
This house was built for laser tag.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
