Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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