Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Sorry my hands just texted you
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Randomize
