i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Help. Why am I so naked?
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