I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch